The Waiting Game

 I’m a jumble of emotions right now.

Anticipation. Excitement. Frustration. Joy. Anger. Discouragement. Happiness. They are all mixed together, surfacing one after the other, pretty much uncontrollably.  Yay hormones.

A cozy Christmas Evening as a family of three.

A cozy Christmas Evening as a family of three.

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  1. Barbara says:

    What a wonderful and hopeful post you have written. It has given me positives to think about as the new year comes sliding in. I have enjoyed your posts all year long and look forward to them in 2016. Blessings on your and your family and may you all be happy, healthy and loved in the New Year.

    • Alexandra Wilson says:

      Thanks, Barbara! I can’t wait to write more in the coming year. It’s hard to believe that 2016 is TOMORROW! Whoa!

  2. Dori Troutman says:

    Oh Alex. I loved this post so much. Do you know that it made me cry? Your writing does that to me sometimes… gets me right in the heart strings. I too was late with my babies. And luckily I had a doctor that did not insist on induction as I really did want to have them naturally. My daughter was exactly 16 days late and yes… I wish NO ONE had known my due date. It was miserable every time the phone rang. I finally started answering it like this: “No baby, no labor, no contractions”! 🙂 I’m glad you are the kind of girl that has the courage to just hang in there! That precious little one will be happy and yes, chubby and healthy! The best kind! The warmest hugs to you my Farmgirl friend!

    – Dori, the Ranch Farmgirl –

    P.S. And thank you for those profound words – exactly what I’ve been thinking myself. “Love ourselves for how we are in some way, not for how we think we should be”. xoxo

    • Alexandra Wilson says:

      Oh, Dori! Thank you for writing this. I’m still at home…no baby, no labor, continuous unproductive contractions. I know I will at least be able to go two weeks “over” without pressure to induce, so that’s a relief. And I know I don’t have to say yes to anything I don’t want to! I’m considering handing my phone and Facebook privileges over to my mom and Evan because it’s all driving me bonkers! I’m sorry I made you cry, but also flattered. Thank you for your words of encouragement and solidarity!! You have lots to love about YOU!

  3. Lynn Lind says:

    Have you noticed there’s no tinsel anywhere? Did the gov’t outlaw tinsel for some weird reason — like, babies can eat it and it makes them sick? That’s basically what happened to D-con…

    • Alexandra Wilson says:

      Ummmm….I don’t know? I’ve seen some tinsel, we have a cheesy tinsel garland and I heard a fluff story on NPR about tinsel crafts like purses and bracelets on Etsy. I haven’t seen the old school loose tinsel for a long time, though. Growing up we had some that was my great grandma’s and we would save it year after year. I wonder if it’s still around?

      • Lynn Lind says:

        P.S. — Love your Charlie Brown Christmas tree! AND a story about my mom… She wouldn’t tell anyone she was pregnant because that meant a little less time she had to put with all the pregnancy jokes, remarks and comments everywhere she went!!! So she started dreading the moment she conceived… which in my case was 10 days after they got married… which just added to the comments, remarks and …. speculations back in 1950!!! Hang in there!

  4. The baby will come when the baby is fully cooked. 🙂 I was always overdue, and I think it’s pretty common. But the waiting is hard. So very hard!

  5. Joan says:

    Love your post!!! pic’s and the thought that we all need to care about ourselves – JUST THE WAY WE ARE!!! We each have great qualities so why dwell on the bad – only perceived qualities. Now if the little one has not made an appearance – try to enjoy the time – I’ve been there and I know that that is very hard to do but you can do it. God bless.

  6. Judy Coleman says:

    Hello Alex,
    I so loved the part of your post about lifting ourselves up this new year and really celebrating the great things we already are and things we have!! Crafty hands, feet that carry us through the woods, the ability and desire to work in gardens in all weather!! Excellent thoughts coming out of your hormone induced state!! 🙂 Can’t wait to hear about that baby ….all in good time…no pressure!!!
    Judy from upstate NY

  7. Meredith Williams says:

    Alexandra, my new year resolution is to live each day without worrying about tomorrow. Our daughter is 16, and she will be going off to college in two years! We are at the opposite end of parenting a child as you are, and my advice to you is to cherish each day with your children, no matter what, because you will get from where you are, to where we are, in a flash! Honestly, it goes by so fast, one day you will look up and realize how much time has passed and it will literally shock you. So ENJOY those babies! Much love and best wishes for a healthy delivery!

  8. Deb Bosworth says:

    Howdy Alex,

    I can relate to your feelings of impatience. I was over-due with our daughter ( she was our second) and I didn’t expect that because our first( our son) was two weeks early. As I read your post I remember being curt with my co-workers who would call me daily at home after I went on maternity leave weeks before my due date. They forgave me of-course and your loved ones will too. I love what you said about being ” good” with who we are and not setting ourselves up for trying to make huge changes then feeling like failure when we don’t accomplish everything we said we would in the face of a new year. I just want to stay in the flow of the river of my life. I like where it’s taking me these days! 😉 Can’t wait to meet your new little one… Next time, for sure!

    Hugs and huge blessings for a quick and safe birth!

    Deb ( Beach Farmgirl )

  9. Phyllis Parrish says:

    I enjoyed your post very much. I’m new here, but couldn’t not reply. I agree with your thoughts for a more forgiving voice for ourselves. I wish you and your’ s a safe and Happy New Year. I pray for a safe delivery for both you and baby.

  10. Marilyn Collins says:

    Wishing you and yours a Happy,Healthy New Year full of blessings. Look forward to your next post and hopefully the baby will have arrived. Take care and wishing you all the best in 2016. Ava is adorable. I love your Charlie brown tree!
    Marilyn and family

  11. Carol says:

    I enjoyed this post and I hope that you have a newborn that you are enjoying.

  12. Denise Ross says:

    Wonderful uplifting post, Alex. Loving the focus you put on loving the you/me not as we think we should be, but as we are now. Love it! I’ve written this out so I will remover these words. Hoping all goes well for you and your bubs birth. Merry Christmas and happy new year. May you and your family be deeply blessed in 2016
    Hugs from Australia

  13. Pingback: Momma Cow… Where Is Your Calf? | Farmgirl Bloggers

  14. Susana says:

    You scared me when I read you were going to put on skates….while pregnant! Girl are you crazy? What if you fell…golly i hope you didnt!

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Dear Little One

Happy Holidays Farmgirls!  It sure is feeling Christmassy around here.  Our tree is up, our stockings are hung (Santa even visited the stockings early…) and there are scraps of wrapping paper accumulating here and there.  I’ve sent off most of my gifts and have been contemplating what treats we should start baking.

Ava hangs her first ornament on our Charlie Brown Christmas Tree.

Ava hangs her first ornament on our Charlie Brown Christmas Tree.

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  1. Bonnie ellis says:

    Alex: What a sweet letter to your next babe. You are such wonderful parents and your children will be loved and cared for forever. I hope your delivery goes well and say hi to your mom from Minnesota, I’m from Minnesota too. Merry Christmas.

    • Alexandra Wilson says:

      Thank you, Bonnie! I will definitely send her some Minnesota greetings. She is happy to escape the “Seattle-like” weather of Minnesota and get some good ol’ snow. Merry Christmas to you, too.

  2. Dori Troutman says:

    Dear Alex,

    The letter made me cry. Then smile. Then cry some more. So very precious!

    And you look FABULOUS!!!!! I can’t wait for little baby Wilder to come and I’m so happy your own Momma is there with you. How long does she get to stay? I’m hoping baby comes soon!

    Big Christmas hugs!

    – Dori –

    • Alexandra Wilson says:

      Thanks, Dori! My mom is here for awhile–she doesn’t have a ticket home yet, so she can be here for at least a few weeks after the new arrival. I am so grateful. Christmas hugs to you and yours, too!

  3. Emma says:

    Eek! This made me a little verklempt, and not just because I miss you all so much. I cannot wait to meet the newest addition. You will be the best mama x2!

  4. Barb P says:

    Sweet post! Merry Christmas to you and your family!

  5. Deborah says:

    That was one of the most beautiful letters I have EVER read that was to a child!! I have printed it out and I will read it to my two boys who are now 19 and 13 years old. I remember being pregnant and thinking, feeling and doing all of the things you mentioned in your letter. Congratulations to both you and your family.

    Have a beautiful Christmas and Happy New Year and I will be thinking of you when I re-read this again tonight!!!

    Blessings,

    Deborah Anderson

    • Alexandra Wilson says:

      Wow, Deborah–Thank you! I appreciate it. I hope your boys like it as well. Merry Christmas to all of you. I hope it is cheery and bright!

  6. Marilyn Collins says:

    What a lovely and loving letter. Wishing you and yours a Blessed and Merry Christmas. December babies are special. My older sister is a December baby as was my late mother. i have a lot of December birthdays in my extended family. God Bles s you and yours.
    Marilyn and family

    • Alexandra Wilson says:

      Thank you, Marilyn! I think December babies are special–but maybe I’m a little biased because I was one, too :). I also have many good friends and some family who are December birthdays. Perhaps the goodness comes from all of those winter snuggles as newborns!

  7. Deb Bosworth says:

    Dear Alex,

    Well, you did it to me again. First, with your letter Ava and now this one. Tears are rollin! My baby turns 18 in February. I’m gonna write a letter.
    You look absolutely radiant, even in your goofy picture! 🙂

    Many blessings to your sweet little family… Cannot wait to to meet Wilder # 2…Not that you asked or anything, but I think it’s a boy…:)

    Big hugs,
    Deb, ( Beach Farmgirl )

    • Alexandra Wilson says:

      Thanks, Deb! I have a slight inkling it’s a boy too…but I thought Ava was, too. We are excited to find out! I love the idea of writing letters to children–they are little time capsules of emotion, what could be more beautiful? And thank you for your compliments, always!

  8. Cindy says:

    Beautiful! Hope you have a wonderful Christmas with your new arrival! God Bless!

  9. Gail says:

    Well, I read this for a second time and cried again. What a beautiful letter and I love the photos. I’m so glad that “Sampa” Mickie is there. Please tell that Sampa to give lots of extra kisses to Ava’s little brother or sister. Love Sampa and Sampa Pederson

    • Alexandra Wilson says:

      Thank you, Sampa Gail! I think you are now officially “Gamma Gail.” We are grateful for gamma Mickie, too! Ava sure loves her grandparents. Love you!

  10. Pam DeMarrais says:

    I am so excited for you….it will be a very special holiday! You look great. All of your healthy farm girl living shows.
    Have a wonderful Christmas and New Year with your family. Can’t wait to hear the news of the birth!

    • Alexandra Wilson says:

      Thank you, Pam! You are right–this lifestyle is conducive to a healthy, more-comfortable-than-expected pregnancy. I’m feeling pretty good despite feeling huge! Merry Christmas and Happy New Year to you, too!

  11. Joan says:

    It is the 23rd and I hope all is well!!!! Your post is simply ‘PRECIOUS’. God bless, Merry Christmas, Happy New Year!!

  12. Jennifer says:

    The best Christmas present I received this year was finding a letter my mother wrote to me on Christmas Day, 37 years ago, while I was still in utero. She has been gone from this world almost a year now and this was written before the demons that plagued our lives had even come ’round. It has been immensely comforting to know, even for just the past couple days, that my parents loved me and wanted me absolutely. That the beginning of me was happy.

    I pray that your babies and you and your husband, too, know that about yourselves all the days of your lives.

  13. Susana says:

    Sorry I’m late reading this…. You should be a writer! You write so elegantly. Im hoping all goes well with your pregnancy and the little guy is not so restless. You might want to eat peanut butter and an apple with a glass of milk in the afternoon. It has a way of calming the baby at night inside you…as they get what their mommy eats. There’s plenty of magnesium and calcium in those, ehich helps restlessness i. You and the baby. Hope jt helps you. May your fsmily be blessedwhrn he comes….im pretty sure its a boy as your bearing down much….boys are restless too. Good luck with staying relaxed.Susana

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Who’s the Cook?

Ahhh, traditions!  Almost every family has them, and they are especially prevalent this time of year.  A lot of families bake batches of cookies or create ornaments for distant relatives.  Numerous others have little whimsical things that are particular to their families.

ava rolling pin #2

We can’t start them too young, can we? Look at those cute little hands. This is making Thanksgiving leftover pizza!

Continue reading

  1. Linda says:

    We must have peanut bars. Some people call them mocha cakes, but my beloved mother-in-law called them peanut bars and thus they shall remain. These once a year treats are small squares of yellow or sponge cake dipped in a thin petit fours type frosting, and rolled in ground peanuts – salted is best. The cake cannot be a cake mix cake – it must be a fairly dense homemade cake. I used the ancient family birthday cake recipe. The delightful confections are wonderful fresh off the production line but actually taste better if left to age a few days in a cool spot. The flavors meld together and are literally food of the gods. I learned to make these 45 years ago as a very young wife. Mom is no longer with us but the memory of making peanut bars and ca 20 other kinds of Christmas cookies is strong and precious.

  2. Gail says:

    I love the pictures and the “new family” tradition. While we always had lefse when Evan was growing up, we didn’t make it….many good Norwegians, providing it freely at ample church bazaars. His Grandma Isabelle didn’t like sugar on hers…we now have the tradition of having an unsugared piece on the tray in her memory.
    Krumkake with Dennis’ family was always special as the boys were growing up. Another assembly line needed to get them rolled before they cool. Going from the stovetop iron to the double electric revolutionized the process a few years ago.
    Ava will be ready for her next clay experience with all that “rolling, rolling, rolling.”
    We love you guys! Mom and Dad Pederson

  3. Susabelle says:

    Having moved a thousand miles away from our families five years ago, we have our own T-giving dinners now. Sometimes we invite single or at-odds friends who have nowhere else to go. This year it was just my daughters and my husband and I; we had horrible weather and it was best that most people just stayed home and away from icy roads. I wet-brine the turkey (I won’t do it any other way any more), peel lots of potatoes, trim the Brussels sprouts, toast the bread in the oven for stuffing. All sooooo good. We usually eat in the afternoon, so we can lay around being lazy the rest of the day. I do most of the work myself, because I’m truly a one-(wo)man wrecking crew in the kitchen – I work like a very well-oiled machine. I know what goes in next and I am not idle the whole time, about four hours or so. Then we eat all the noms. So good. 🙂

  4. Bonnie ellis says:

    Such an adorable little lefsa a maker you have there. No wonder you take lots of pictures. Your master lefse maker is handsome too. Such a great tradition to pass on. We love lease with salmon and cream sauce. Or with jelly or lingonberries (something like small cranberries). We make lease for our church Smorgasbord ar Christmas. My dil sent me a package early in Dec. one year. I thought it was too early but put it under the tree anyways. When I opened it on Christmas it was spoiled…she didn’t tell me it was lefse so I didn’t refrigerate it. Now she clearly marks the package.

  5. Marilyn Collins says:

    Thank you for sharing this post. One of our traditions is to hang our stockings up. We always purchase a tall 7 to 8 foot tree. In fact we bought ours today. We also open Advent calendars and have for many years. Wishing you and yours a Blessed and Merry Christmas. May 2016 bring you joy,health and love.
    Marilyn and Family

  6. Joan says:

    Oh what extra fun this posting is!!!! Not sure if it the tradition of the lefse or seeing Ava in the kitchen – nothing more fun than making memories and traditions with children. Mine is grown and so are the grandchildren – so when I can, I share traditions with them if they are interested. I was raised in a huge family with lots of ‘must do’s’ for any time 5-10 of us got together – so that was often – miss those days. Thanks for helping me remember them. Thanks for sharing your family. God bless.

  7. Dori Troutman says:

    Hi Alex,

    These pictures are so precious! I love it when little ones get to help in the kitchen! My daughter has always been so good with her little girls helping out with the cooking and now the seven year old can do amazing things in the kitchen! Ava will be the same way!

    I’ve always been curious about Lefse and now I’m eager to give it a try! I love that Evan does that.

    Hope you’re feeling good? Christmas is not too far away so that means your new little one isn’t either! Hope it all goes well for you and can’t wait to hear the news!

    Tight hugs,

    Dori

  8. Becky Bartlett says:

    I remember Christmas Eve and oyster stew. I hated the oysters, so my dad got them and I enjoyed the creamy soup. The evening also included church and opening gifts.
    Another memory was the Candy Cane cookies. I enjoyed making them and of course eating them.
    Have a Merry Christmas way up there in Alaska.
    Love you
    Aunt Becky (Evan’s side)

  9. Deb Bosworth says:

    Hey Alex,
    It’s wonderful to see all of you working together in the kitchen. Ava is getting so big and what a great little helper she is! Let’s see… we spent Thanksgiving at home ( just our immediate family ) as well. Like you, no time crunches or extra food prep. I cooked all day off and on and relaxed in between with the family. My hubby is our cranberry sauce maker. He makes it every year and it’s yummy. So much tastier than the canned variety. Tart and sweet. You must be getting excited for the new arrival… Just think… Next time you write you just might be a a mommy of two! Can’t wait to meet the newest member of your family… Merry Christmas and blessings for a smooth birth!
    Hugs,
    Deb ( the beach farmgirl )

  10. Susan says:

    Sorry its taken me this long to respond ….avas cute….remind me when my kids were her age…..thry lived to maje stuff with me..,its probably why they are such good cooks now. And your flat bread reminds me of making potatoe pancakes, …i never was crazy about them, as they had a heavy taste for me and i could never eat more than one. But traditions have a way of repeating. Holiday baking was always one of ours. Glad you had a fun time….susana

Leave a Comment

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Who's the Cook?

Ahhh, traditions!  Almost every family has them, and they are especially prevalent this time of year.  A lot of families bake batches of cookies or create ornaments for distant relatives.  Numerous others have little whimsical things that are particular to their families.

ava rolling pin #2

We can’t start them too young, can we? Look at those cute little hands. This is making Thanksgiving leftover pizza!

Continue reading

  1. Linda says:

    We must have peanut bars. Some people call them mocha cakes, but my beloved mother-in-law called them peanut bars and thus they shall remain. These once a year treats are small squares of yellow or sponge cake dipped in a thin petit fours type frosting, and rolled in ground peanuts – salted is best. The cake cannot be a cake mix cake – it must be a fairly dense homemade cake. I used the ancient family birthday cake recipe. The delightful confections are wonderful fresh off the production line but actually taste better if left to age a few days in a cool spot. The flavors meld together and are literally food of the gods. I learned to make these 45 years ago as a very young wife. Mom is no longer with us but the memory of making peanut bars and ca 20 other kinds of Christmas cookies is strong and precious.

  2. Gail says:

    I love the pictures and the “new family” tradition. While we always had lefse when Evan was growing up, we didn’t make it….many good Norwegians, providing it freely at ample church bazaars. His Grandma Isabelle didn’t like sugar on hers…we now have the tradition of having an unsugared piece on the tray in her memory.
    Krumkake with Dennis’ family was always special as the boys were growing up. Another assembly line needed to get them rolled before they cool. Going from the stovetop iron to the double electric revolutionized the process a few years ago.
    Ava will be ready for her next clay experience with all that “rolling, rolling, rolling.”
    We love you guys! Mom and Dad Pederson

  3. Susabelle says:

    Having moved a thousand miles away from our families five years ago, we have our own T-giving dinners now. Sometimes we invite single or at-odds friends who have nowhere else to go. This year it was just my daughters and my husband and I; we had horrible weather and it was best that most people just stayed home and away from icy roads. I wet-brine the turkey (I won’t do it any other way any more), peel lots of potatoes, trim the Brussels sprouts, toast the bread in the oven for stuffing. All sooooo good. We usually eat in the afternoon, so we can lay around being lazy the rest of the day. I do most of the work myself, because I’m truly a one-(wo)man wrecking crew in the kitchen – I work like a very well-oiled machine. I know what goes in next and I am not idle the whole time, about four hours or so. Then we eat all the noms. So good. 🙂

  4. Bonnie ellis says:

    Such an adorable little lefsa a maker you have there. No wonder you take lots of pictures. Your master lefse maker is handsome too. Such a great tradition to pass on. We love lease with salmon and cream sauce. Or with jelly or lingonberries (something like small cranberries). We make lease for our church Smorgasbord ar Christmas. My dil sent me a package early in Dec. one year. I thought it was too early but put it under the tree anyways. When I opened it on Christmas it was spoiled…she didn’t tell me it was lefse so I didn’t refrigerate it. Now she clearly marks the package.

  5. Marilyn Collins says:

    Thank you for sharing this post. One of our traditions is to hang our stockings up. We always purchase a tall 7 to 8 foot tree. In fact we bought ours today. We also open Advent calendars and have for many years. Wishing you and yours a Blessed and Merry Christmas. May 2016 bring you joy,health and love.
    Marilyn and Family

  6. Joan says:

    Oh what extra fun this posting is!!!! Not sure if it the tradition of the lefse or seeing Ava in the kitchen – nothing more fun than making memories and traditions with children. Mine is grown and so are the grandchildren – so when I can, I share traditions with them if they are interested. I was raised in a huge family with lots of ‘must do’s’ for any time 5-10 of us got together – so that was often – miss those days. Thanks for helping me remember them. Thanks for sharing your family. God bless.

  7. Dori Troutman says:

    Hi Alex,

    These pictures are so precious! I love it when little ones get to help in the kitchen! My daughter has always been so good with her little girls helping out with the cooking and now the seven year old can do amazing things in the kitchen! Ava will be the same way!

    I’ve always been curious about Lefse and now I’m eager to give it a try! I love that Evan does that.

    Hope you’re feeling good? Christmas is not too far away so that means your new little one isn’t either! Hope it all goes well for you and can’t wait to hear the news!

    Tight hugs,

    Dori

  8. Becky Bartlett says:

    I remember Christmas Eve and oyster stew. I hated the oysters, so my dad got them and I enjoyed the creamy soup. The evening also included church and opening gifts.
    Another memory was the Candy Cane cookies. I enjoyed making them and of course eating them.
    Have a Merry Christmas way up there in Alaska.
    Love you
    Aunt Becky (Evan’s side)

  9. Deb Bosworth says:

    Hey Alex,
    It’s wonderful to see all of you working together in the kitchen. Ava is getting so big and what a great little helper she is! Let’s see… we spent Thanksgiving at home ( just our immediate family ) as well. Like you, no time crunches or extra food prep. I cooked all day off and on and relaxed in between with the family. My hubby is our cranberry sauce maker. He makes it every year and it’s yummy. So much tastier than the canned variety. Tart and sweet. You must be getting excited for the new arrival… Just think… Next time you write you just might be a a mommy of two! Can’t wait to meet the newest member of your family… Merry Christmas and blessings for a smooth birth!
    Hugs,
    Deb ( the beach farmgirl )

  10. Susan says:

    Sorry its taken me this long to respond ….avas cute….remind me when my kids were her age…..thry lived to maje stuff with me..,its probably why they are such good cooks now. And your flat bread reminds me of making potatoe pancakes, …i never was crazy about them, as they had a heavy taste for me and i could never eat more than one. But traditions have a way of repeating. Holiday baking was always one of ours. Glad you had a fun time….susana

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